How to deal with stress

Picture this: your energy, once vibrant and boundless, starts to wane. Slowly, almost imperceptibly, you notice the decline.

Yet, like a frog in slowly heating water, you wonder if this is just the norm. Thoughts creep in — “Everyone’s stressed, right? Maybe I’m overthinking this.”

So, you do what many of us do: you accept it. But let’s be clear, this isn’t a post about motivation. It’s not about urging you to muster a burst of enthusiasm or artificially pump yourself up.

Instead, it’s about cultivating awareness, about recognizing the signs before they snowball into something unmanageable. It’s about closing the gate before the horse bolts and refusing to wait until the 11th hour to make a change.

Because here’s the truth: While you might be performing decently on the professional front, personally, things might be a train wreck.

The undercurrent of stress and discontent is pulling you down, and you might not even realize the extent of its impact. You sense it in the waning enthusiasm at work, in the way you treat your body as if it were an amusement park, neglecting its needs for rest, nourishment, and care.

You see it in the precious moments you should be spending with your family, which are being sacrificed to the ever-expanding demands of your schedule. The strain on your relationships becomes evident through emotional outbursts, moments you wish you could take back but that leave their mark nonetheless.

And your solution? You bury your head in the proverbial sand, throwing yourself even deeper into your work, hoping that the pressures and anxieties will magically sort themselves out.

But the truth is, avoiding the issues only exacerbates the problem. Ignoring what you know you should be addressing creates a dissonance within you, a gnawing feeling that something’s not right.

This internal conflict between knowing what needs to change and resisting that change only breeds more misery, low energy, and a sense of being trapped in a rut.

These are the unconscious signals — negative memories, unresolved emotions — that demand resolution. They surface at inconvenient moments, disrupting your mental equilibrium until they’re dealt with.

And these issues won’t simply disappear until you face them head-on.

The irony is, as you expend energy suppressing these negative emotions or resorting to unhealthy coping mechanisms, you inadvertently magnify the problem.

Instead of dissipating, the discomfort lingers, weighing you down further.

So, what’s the way out of this cycle? How can you start reclaiming your energy, your sense of well-being, and your overall equilibrium?

The answer lies in embracing positive stress methods. It’s not about avoiding stress altogether — a feat that’s nearly impossible in the modern world. Rather, it’s about cultivating a healthy relationship with stress, understanding your capacities, resources, and adaptations.

It’s about recognizing that not all stress is bad, and that a certain level of challenge can actually propel you forward. Imagine a balance — the total demands and pressures you face, weighed against your ability to handle them, your personal resources.

Striking this equilibrium is key to maintaining your energy and well-being.

This isn’t a one-size-fits-all solution. It’s about recognizing your unique circumstances, your strengths, and your limitations. It’s about practicing self-awareness, identifying the areas of your life that are tipping the balance, and taking deliberate steps to regain control.

In conclusion, the journey to reclaiming your energy and well-being begins with awareness. It’s about acknowledging the signs of decline, understanding the consequences of avoidance, and embracing stress as a force that can be harnessed for growth.

By recognizing the interplay between demands and resources, you can regain your sense of equilibrium and create a life that’s not only professionally successful but personally fulfilling as well.

It won’t be an overnight transformation, but every step you take towards awareness and positive change is a step towards a brighter, more balanced future.

For more information on The High Value Executive Program click here

How to improve the quality of your life

To achieve this you need to improve your habits. I’ll explain why.

Years ago I was caught in the ‘lottery win’ mindset.

I convinced myself that overnight success was the result of some windfall. A brush with good fortune.

This was the reason people had aquired their life situation.

What didn’t help was that the media, movies and tabloids would all cement this notion.

But as time passed and I started researching, reading, experimenting. And speaking to the most revered in my industry (people who had achieved great levels of success). I began to form a different hypothesis.

One that was at the other end of the spectrum to ‘overnight success’.

That it takes a lot of time for overnight success to occur. It is actually the culmination of months or years of work.

It’s the small efforts repeated daily that led to a better quality of life.

I’m talking about the small actions that we don’t even think about, because they are habitual. The decisions we make in autopilot mode.

But these are the decisions that shape our future.

So how do we address them? And improve the quality of our lives?

Well, there are some steps, 4 actually. Steps that you can climb up to make change inevitable.

1. The first step is the unconscious incompetence stage.

This is when we’re making bad decisions and we aren’t even aware we’re doing it.

We just know that things aren’t working out.

Here’s were something as being cognisant can help. Bringing tracking into the equation. For our sleep, our diet, our exercise and our stress.

‘that sounds like a lot of time‘. I hear you say.

Oh contrare mon frère’.

It’s no extra time! – you’re already doing this stuff so you just record at the time.

After this you’ll then enter into the next stage which is

3. The conscious incompetence.

You start to look at the actual decision and data. It makes it clear.

This is where you are aware that you’re not making optimal decions

You can see that you’re not adhering to the plan you have, if you even have a plan.

You can see where poor choices are actually hindering you.

This is the ‘wow I didn’t realise I was having that many calories’

or ‘I thought I was getting more sleep than that’.

‘Maybe I could cancel my gym membership because I’ve only been once this month’

and the classic – ‘this app can’t be working right’.

It is, and they are! Your ego is just having a hard time coming to terms with your choices.

Remember our thoughts are not the truth but rather stories that we get caught up in!

This is the cold hard truth slapping you across the face, the reality punch to the gut!

An uncomfortable period where you realise things are not as they seem. Or rather as you ‘believed’

Quickly moving on to the next stage 🙂

3. The conscious competence stage

This is where your decisions are improving. Due to some changes you’ve implemented (through self or professional guidance).

You’re making better decisions. But they’re not automatic yet. It still requires effort and discipline to make these decisions.

This is a nice stage as you can actually see change occurring with your actions. You feel good from making better decisions.

4. Then you arrive at the unconscious competence stage.

After enough time in the previous stage. These new benficial life changing decisions become automatic.

You’ve likely amended or introduced a routine which makes actions habitual. And in this ascension you’ve form a new identity.

You see yourself as the person who eats healthy, goes to the gym, gets 8 hours sleep. And is relaxed from practicing mindfulness exercises.

You’re energetic and ethused. You have more clarity and you’re making better decisions as this 2.0 version of you.

Which stage are you in?

How I found my purpose

I’d like to take this opportunity to tell you why I do what I do.

The genesis of becoming a health consultant.

It wasn’t a result of happenstance. It stemmed from an event that occurred in my formative years.

At the time my dad had a senior job in the city which saw him start very early and finish very late.

I didn’t see all that much of him. Some times at the weekend but those periods were fleeting.

This seemed to be the norm for the schooling part of my life.

And over time this high pressure senior role took its toll on him.

His energy levels declined, his stress increased and he was having more doctors appointments.

They were concerned with his health.

Turns out that chronic high stress, zero activity. A diet that resembled a 5 year olds birthday party. And a bullfrogs sleep routine wasn’t all that conducive to a healthy living.

Who knew?!

Reality hit home when the cardiologist said that with without open heart surgery a cardiac event was imminent!

It wasn’t a choice. It was an ultimatum. Surgery or you’ll be shuffling off this mortal coil!

It seemed like only days later he was checked in to hospital.

They opened him up and veins were taken from various other parts of his body and replaced those blocked ones around his heart.

That’s what I was told anyway, this period in my life was a bit blurry.

Although I do remember, very vividly, coming home after school – and finding myself alone a fair bit.

As my mum would be at his bedside at the hospital.

I’d make meals for myself and my mum for when she would return late at night.

It was all a bit surreal. And I didn’t understand the severity of the situation. Not until I went to visit my dad.

I remember it was one of the first times I’d been into the City.

Everything was overwhelming, the amount of people, the buildings the noise and the pace of it all.

Several hours had past in what felt like only a few minutes. And we had reached the station adjacent the hospital.

I remember walking in to the ward and seeing my dad.

I barely recognised him

When I sat down beside him I remember being asked questions by the doctor and nurses.

Light hearted chit chat they’d developed from years of developing a bedside manner.

But I didn’t respond. I could muster any words. My mum had to respond for me. As I was transfixed on my dad.

You know when you feel yourself come out of yourself, in a malaise?! That sort of thing.

I was starring at the person that was lying there in the hospital bed hooked up to the machines, and wiring.

It was almost like he wasn’t a human but part of a machine.

The Doctors and my mum trying to lighten the mood. Regaling me with stories of his projectile vomiting post surgery.

But this didn’t permeate the trance I was in.

I remember feeling numb.

And then I felt anger. Angry that this had happened

That he’d let this happen, that he’d chose this.

It wasn’t an unfortunate set of circumstances or genetics

It was the choices he’d made compounded over time that had culminated in this.

This fucked up situation where I didn’t know if he was coming home or not.

I remember the cessation of our visit and being prompted to say goodbye by my mum. Walking through the hospital wing towards the elevator.

I remember this very clearly. Because that was the defining moment.

It was when I told myself ‘that was not going to happen to me’.

That it was on me to look after myself. I must learn from other peoples mistakes as well as my own.

And my dad was exhibit A.

It felt like this experience had knocked me out of the status quo lifestyle that everyone was living. And into a parallel dimension running alongside it.

An Anthropological dimension. From which I would extrapolate societal norms and collate information.

Whilst doing this I started to realise that it wasn’t just my dad that was in poor health.

It was my friend’s dads too.

And men I was hearing about in the news (back when I used to read/watch it). So many men were struggling.

But no one was talking about the elephant in the room.

Everyone was accepting it as the norm. I suppose when everyone is sick it’s no longer considered a disease.

Fast forward man years from then to today.

I look back at this experience and whilst it was difficult and frustrating at the time.

I was also grateful that I had gone through it.

Because I had found my purpose; to save men from themselves.

To help them develop the discipline they need. To elude the temptations of modern living (which have become the imperceptible demise of men).

It’s this purpose that gets me up in the morning and keeps me going late in the evening.

I’ve become more enthused about efficiency, productivity and lifestyle habits. Because I need the energy to to propel me through the day and work on my mission.

And the beauty of it; the things I do to work on my purpose are self perpetuating. They give me more energy.

Not only that but the job satisfaction I get from.

Helping others to have more energy, and manage their health so they can give 100% to their passion, is incredible.

Knowing they’ve made an important transition in their life and set an important example for the children they’re raising.

Here’s a testimonial from one of my clients, Alex:

Not only has Andy helped my physical health (I’ve managed to lose 10 kg in 3 months), he’s helped my mental health too.

His constant praise, encouragement and holding me accountable for my actions has meant I’m now more motivated and active.

I’ve started writing a book I’ve been wanting to write for ages, and now feel like I have more time and energy to pursue other interests.

I’m even starting to feel better about myself whenever I see a mirror. I’ve even seen some photos of me recently that I haven’t instantly hated 🙂

Given my time again, I would hire Andy in a heartbeat.

How to naturally increase your dopamine levels.

Our hormones have a big impact on our emotional state, causing both good and bad mood patterns.

Regulating your hormones significantly improves and balances your emotional health.

There are a lot of things that you are doing throughout the day that have an affect on your hormones. Without you even realising.

Dopamine is a hormone that has a massive effect on us. It’s the chemical messenger in your brain that creates feelings of pleasure and reward. Which motivates you to repeat a specific behaviour.

And modern day temptations are very effective at giving us cheap dopamine hits. They are designed to elicit this ‘feel good’ sensation. It’s at the crux of their design and marketing.

Junk food, Porn, Social media, Booze, Nicotine. All elicit these cheap dopamine hits. And these temporary feel goods are very effective.

They target your weakness and keep you coming back for more.

Alcohol for confidence.

Nicotine anxiety.

Social media for boredom.

Junk food for lethargy.

Porn for arousal.

These acute ‘feel goods’ are so common yet so dangerous. Because use of these cheap dopamine hits results in;

Excessive binge eating,

Poor relationships,

Chronic stress,

High blood pressure,

and poor health.

These cheap dopamine hits are killing you!

And without without discipline, it can be very hard to turn down these temptations because they are so effective and immediate. They offer instant gratification to a problem.

And when you start to depend on them, it’s harder to rid yourself of them.

So rather than going cold turkey – which is incredibly hard. Replace them with natural things that you natural dopamine hits.

Swapping them, so your brain doesn’t really notice.

Imagine yourself as Indiana Jones, in Raiders of the Lost Ark, in the tomb swapping that Golden Idol for a bag of sand.

(but much easier and without the tomb kicking off and trying to kill you).

Here are some easy ways to do that!

Eat a high protein diet.

Proteins are made up of smaller building blocks called amino acids. One amino acid, called tyrosine, plays a critical role in the production of dopamine!

Probiotics

The gut and brain are closely linked. Certain species of bacteria that live in your gut are also capable of producing dopamine.

Exercise

Exercise can boost dopamine levels in the brain. Improvements in mood can be seen after as little as 10 minutes of activity but tend to be highest after at least 20 minutes.

Quality sleep

After poor sleep the availability of dopamine receptors in their brains is dramatically reduced by the next morning.

Getting regular, high quality sleep helps keep your dopamine levels balanced. And help you feel more alert and high functioning during the day

Music

Listening to music is an enjoyable way to stimulate dopamine release in your brain.

Listening to music increases activity in the reward and pleasure areas of the brain, rich with dopamine receptors.

Sunlight

Periods of low sunshine exposure can lead to reduced levels of mood-boosting neurotransmitters. Including dopamine. Sunlight exposure can increase them.

Start swapping the unnatural for the natural and I promise you’ll start to feel better.

How to increase your testosterone levels.

High testosterone is essential for a man, and if you aren’t optimising yours you’re leaving happiness and success on the table!

Healthy levels of testosterone are so important. For general health, disease risk, body composition, sexual function and just about everything else.

Additionally, increasing your testosterone levels can cause rapid gains in muscle mass and vitality in only a matter of weeks.

But how can you boost your testosterone levels? And how can you do it naturally so you can avoid hormone replacement therapy?

Let’s have a look at some lifestyle factors that will remedy the situation.

First up is exercise, to be more specific resistance training/weights.

People who lift have higher testosterone levels. Not does exercise increase testosterone levels, and fitness but also reaction times.

Factor into your week a minimum effective dosage. Resistance the urge to go full banana and instead commit to an amount of sessions you can realistically stick to. Even if only 2 sessions per week.

A Balanced diet,

to clarify, is eating enough protein, to aid satiety to aid weight loss, and muscle repair. Having enough carbohydrates also optimize testosterone levels during resistance training. And a balance of fats which are also beneficial for testosterone and health.

Combined with an energy target for your goal you will have a ‘REAL’ healthy diet.

Stress management

Natural elevations in cortisol can reduce testosterone. These hormones work in a seesaw-like manner: as one goes up, the other comes down.

Chronic stress and high cortisol can also increase food intake, weight gain, and the storage of fat around your organs.

This is why it is paramount you input into your day time for actions that will see you decompress, away from stressors and stimulation.

Sleep

Getting good sleep is as, if not more important for your health as diet and exercise. It also has major effects on your testosterone levels.

The ideal amount of sleep varies from person to person. But one study found sleeping only 5 hours per night caused a 15% reduction in testosterone levels!

This is why it would be prudent to implement a bedtime routine that will improve the duration and quality of your sleep. Why not set an alarm at the same time each day to start your bedtime routine

For more help with these lifestyle factors download a free copy of my guide The Gentleman’s Vitality Handbook

How do you have the energy?

Time, time, wherefore art thou time? The question we all ask when it comes to working on our personal goals, business and spending time with our loved ones.

But we know wishing and hoping for more time is futile, as you can’t increase the hours in the day!

But you can increase your energy levels. Which will see you function better and be more productive with the time you do have.

Managing and improving the quality of your time is paramount! As time is the most valuable commodity we have!

You cannot generate more of it (well, only through healthy living).

And how you spend it has a direct correlation on your happiness. Are you a master of your time? Or are you a slave to it?

Are you spending it in accorardance with what you want to achieve in life? Are the actions you take fall in line with reaching your true potential? Do you have the energy to do those things?

The people that are performing at their best. Those who are at the top of their game have an plenty of energy.

Having this energy allows them to perform at their best for longer and be more creative. They consistently execute.

They create this energy through fuelling themselves properly, training efficiently and resting appropriately.

Throw in drive and passion for their profession and they are unstoppable.

So I ask you; do you have the energy that you need to reach your true potential?

You choose.

Every day we make approximately 35,000 decisions

Decisions like:

‘how should I respond to this email’.

‘should I order this meal or this meal’.

‘do I go or not’.

These decisions range from the inconsequential to the very important.

But what we misinterpret is the severity of these ‘inconsequential’ decisions over time.

Those decisions by themselves, in isolation are not important.

It’s the compounding of those poor decisions over time that build into something formidable.

Very rarely are these decisions ‘just for now’ or ‘only this once’.

And here’s the thing, the choices you make day in day out aren’t really choices. You aren’t making any decisions. Because you are on autopilot.

You’ll make the same decision as you did last time.

It’s easier that way. And your mind loves the easy option.

It’s adverse to challenge and discomfort. Which is why it will go with the option that sees avoidance of pain.

Which is irronic because pain is unavoidable.

You can experience it now or later. But you will experience it. And thats why we need look at the choice of pain.

You get to choose your pain.

The pain of exercising or the pain of disapointment from not being able to play with your kids for more than a minute because of poor fitness.

The pain of self restraint with your diet or the pain of feeling uncomfortable in your clothes.

The pain of missing out on another TV episode or the pain of feeling fatigued the next day.

The pain of working on emotional control and stress or the pain of embarrassing yourself from losing your shit at a co worker in front of the entire office.

The pain of building self-discipline or the pain of knowing you’ve let yourself go.

It would be better that you choose the pain rather than your body and mind choose it for you!

How to build motivation

When I talk to people about High Performance, sometimes the word “motivation” comes up.

“I’ve tried all kinds of diets and fitness regimens,” they might say.

Shortly followed by “but I can never seem to keep up the motivation.”

The reality is High Performance has nothing to do with motivation. It’s definitely not the magic key that unlocks your potential. As so many online gurus would have you believe.

High Performance is formed from the process of building habits. Specific actions in your daily routine linked to your goals.

It’s about pursuing your potential for yourself and those that matter most.

It requires a plan, a roadmap, that sees you fine tune your actions. It’s not something you do overnight.

Think about what athletes do (some I’ve coached). They follow a specialized training program. Designed to improve their physical, psychological, technical skill set.

They support their training with habits such as getting restful and restorative sleep. They eat nutritious foods, build mental resilience through mindfulness, and foster supportive relationships.

Notice that motivation wasn’t mentioned once.

That’s because motivation is unreliable. And if you rely on it you are going to be inconsistent with your actions.

Long-term success is built upon small daily actions that move the you closer to your goal.

Modern neuroscience even demonstrates that from these small progressions you’ll be internally rewarded. Through a built-in neurochemical mechanism.

You don’t need superhuman motivation to elevate your performance (because it doesn’t exist).

The process isn’t reserved for gold medallists or billionaire entrepreneurs. All you need is a desire to pursue your potential.

If that’s something you’re interested in click here.

How to improve your energy, confidence & performance.

When we look past the superficial of aesthetics or leanness – is when when we get to the root of our desires.

Going beyond the norms of what society tells us we want, to find our true reason to improve our health and wellbeing.

Which is why want energy, confidence and better performance.

And this is coming from someone who has competed in Body Building.

I’ve attained much more enjoyment from pursuits that have been performance based i.e. Marathons, Power lifting. And I’m even more excited about upcoming open water swim and Mountaineering pursuits.

In terms of physical fitness and performance I’ve never been better than I am now.

And this will only improve because of the compounding effect of the day to day actions that are part of my routine.

I emphasise MY routine because not one size fits all. It has to be bespoke for you!

What you can commit to with exercise, nutrition, sleep and stress management is unique to you.

And you have to optimise those pillars to see you be at your best, to be on top of your game!

And hear me when I say it’s got to be bespoke because when we try and conform to something that is so far removed from our lives it won’t last!

That’s because the regimes and protocols out their are cookie cut on someone else’s plan. And to adapt and adhere to it you have to be at your best or nigh on perfect!

For success a plan needs to work even when you aren’t at your best. What you can be consistent with on your worst days.

Factoring in a margin of error!

Because we don’t rise to our goals we fall to our habits.

Which is what my coaching program The Performance Project is all about.

Devising a plan for you to help you build habits that will see make progress even when life gets hectic.

A plan that works in the face of high pressure and adversity. Taking into consideration all the obstacles that life is sure to throw at us.

Paired with accountability and support to see you break through plateaus and perform at your best.

For more info click here

The invisible hand that guides you.

When it comes to a healthy way of living the Mediterranean’s always seem to get a mention.

They are renowned for their longevity and wellbeing. Many attribute their diet to the reason behind this.

Although over the years I’ve come up with a hypothesis. The premise is that it’s more to do with their geography and culture.

Yes the Mediterranean diet is pretty good, (if you delve into it they get a balance of fats in their diet; monounsaturated, saturated & polyunsaturated and it is high in nutritional value.

But if you look deeper into their lifestyle they also have geography and culture working for them.

The abundance of sunlight they receive provides them with sufficient vitamin D. Something that us Northerners (hemisphere that is) lack.

And, the most salient point, the emphasis they put on sleep.

Biphasic sleep is sown into their culture. Think about it. They down tools every afternoon for a nap.

Siesta.

Not to mention they have such stringent laws on light pollution.

They protect their sleep and it pays off in spades. Especially when it comes to their national health bill.

The same can’t be said for us in the UK. Incurring a £197.4 billion health bill in 2019. And that cost has increased every year since.

Our geography is not as favourable, and our culture not as health conscious or cognisant. And that my friend is a problem because;

when everyone is sick, we no longer consider it a disease!

– Ravikant.

We wear sleep deprivation as a badge of honour when it’s work related.

Which is ironic seeing as though sleep loss over an extended period of time can cause decreased cognitive performance.

Essentially with poor sleep you’re not in control of your emotions and your emotions can control your behaviour.

This leads to the inability to make sound judgments. Poorer choices and below par performance. Along with it health concerns.

Which is why to be at your best you have to optimise your lifestyle. Nutrition, Stress management, Exercise and Sleep.

All these things done well will see you operate at your best.

You’ll have emotional regulation which aids self control, which is a superpower. I would say better than invisibility or flying.

Ultimately you will be making better decisions.

And you are the sum total of all your decisions!