Why do I feel overwhelmed?

Time is scarce with work and parenting. Balancing a demanding career with the responsibilities of parenthood can lead to a constant state of overwhelm.

Struggling with time anxiety and yearning for more control over your life? You’re not alone.

In this post, we’ll explore the causes of time anxiety and offer practical solutions to help you regain your sense of balance and control.

Understanding Time Anxiety

Time anxiety is the concern of having insufficient time. Working parents have to handle many responsibilities, such as work, taking their kids to soccer practice, and putting them to bed. This can create a storm of stress and anxiety.

The Root Causes

  1. Perfectionism: Professional parents often set high standards for themselves both at work and at home. The fear of not meeting these standards can lead to anxiety.
  2. Lack of boundaries: It’s easy for work to spill into family time and, vice versa, eroding the boundaries between these essential aspects of life.
  3. Over committing: can make you feel overwhelmed and stretched thin.

Solutions

  1. Prioritize and Delegate: Identify your most important tasks at work and at home. Delegate or outsource less critical tasks to free up your time.
  2. Set Clear Boundaries: Establish boundaries between work and family time. Create a dedicated workspace at home and communicate your availability to your employer and family.
  3. Time blocking: can help you schedule work, family and relaxation time into specific blocks. Stick to your schedule as much as possible.
  4. Practice Self-Compassion: Let go of perfectionism. Understand that it’s okay to not do everything. Don’t beat yourself up when things go wrong.
  5. Mindfulness and relaxation: Incorporate mindfulness practices into your daily routine. Meditation, deep breathing exercises, or a short walk can help reduce stress and anxiety.
  6. Seek Support: ask for help. Whether it’s from a partner, family member, or childcare services, sharing responsibilities can ease your burden.
  7. Time Management Tools: use time management apps and tools to track your tasks, set reminders, and stay organized.
  8. Outsourcing and Simplifying: Consider outsourcing tasks like cleaning or grocery shopping to save time. Simplify your daily routines where possible.
  9. Learn to Say No: Be selective about taking on new commitments. Saying “no” when necessary is a powerful way to protect your time.
  10. Seek help: If you’re struggling with time anxiety, seek help from a behavioural coach or therapist for coping strategies.

Time anxiety is a common challenge for professional parents, but it’s not insurmountable.

You can take control of your time and balance work and parenting by trying these strategies and changing your routine.

Remember, it’s okay to seek support and prioritize self-care on this journey towards a more fulfilling and less anxious life.

Feel like you don’t have enough time?

Do you feel like there’s not enough hours in the day?

You’re no stranger to the relentless demands of balancing work, family, and personal goals.

The constant fretting over whether there’s enough time to accomplish everything can leave you feeling out of control, overwhelmed, and like you’re always moving too slowly.

It’s a familiar struggle – the feeling that time is slipping through your fingers.

This anxiety often stems from a perception of having a lack of time, which can be addressed.

In this blog post, we will explore effective time management strategies to help you regain control and prioritize what’s important in your life.

  1. Mindfulness: One of the most powerful tools to combat the stress of limited time is mindfulness. Incorporating mindfulness into your daily routines can make a significant difference. Start by paying attention to the present moment. When you’re with your children, be fully present with them. When you’re working on a task, focus solely on that task. Mindfulness helps you appreciate each moment and prevents the constant worrying about what comes next.
  2. Journal: At the end of your day, take a few minutes to reflect in a journal. Write down what causes the feelings of anxiety related to time. This practice of self-reflection can help you identify recurring patterns and triggers. By acknowledging these stressors, you can begin to address and manage them more effectively.
  3. Address the Underlying Issue: Sometimes, the anxiety about time is rooted in a deeper issue – a feeling of helplessness or a belief that you can’t control time. It’s essential to remind yourself that you can’t stop time from moving, but you can control what you do in the present moment. Reflect on what it means to spend your time beneficially. Are you aligning your actions with your priorities? By consciously making choices that align with your goals and values, you’ll feel more in control of your time.
  4. Talk with a Professional: Seeking professional guidance can be immensely beneficial. A behavioural coach like myself can help you navigate the complex interplay of feelings, thoughts, choices, and actions. Through meaningful conversations, you can gain insights and develop strategies to manage stress and maximize your productivity as a professional parent.

In the fast-paced world of professional parenting, it’s easy to succumb to the feeling that there’s never enough time.

However, by practicing mindfulness, journaling to identify stress triggers, addressing underlying issues, and seeking guidance from a professional, you can regain control of your time and start prioritizing what truly matters.

Don’t let anxiety about time hold you back from achieving your potential.

Remember, time is a precious resource – it’s how you use it that truly counts.

Click here to explore how I can help you take control of your life and reach your goals.

How to stay consistent

Let’s dive into something countless individuals confide in me, a struggle that resonates profoundly – the quest for consistency.

I’ve walked this path too, and through countless conversations, I’ve seen a recurring theme.

Many are trapped in a cycle – aspiring for change, yet wrestling with its maintenance.

It’s a familiar script: initial zeal succeeded by distracting deviations.

The notion that a new partner, house, or job holds the key to our sought-after validation and joy often guides these pursuits.

But, here’s the twist: old challenges remerge, blurring that initial hope. Familiar issues resurface, birthing discontent.

This cyclic dance leads to unhappiness in relationships, dissatisfaction in careers, and a general feeling of unrest.

It’s a phenomenon I call the “shiny object syndrome.” The relentless pull of distraction, fuelled by the belief that novelty is the doorway to contentment.

This instinct traces back to our craving for newness, a trait etched in childhood – remember yearning for the latest toys?

This pattern imprisons us, propelling us from one endeavor to another, hoping the next “shiny object” will unlock serenity.

Progress blooms when we recognize distractions as costly diversions from fundamental resolutions.

The core change eludes us until we delve into our own depths. Partners, homes, jobs – they can’t rewrite our script.

The pivot arrives when we challenge our excuses, steering behaviours towards genuine metamorphosis.

This shift amplifies relationships, nurtures mental and physical well-being, and illuminates fulfillment.

I invite you to reflect upon this perspective. Together, let’s chart a course beyond the cycle, towards authenticity and lasting transformation.

Overcoming Procrastination and Embracing Change

If you’re reading this, it’s likely that you’re considering joining the High Value Executive program.

Yet, perhaps doubts are lingering in your mind, casting shadows over your aspirations. Doubts are natural companions on any journey of transformation, but they need not hold you back.

In fact, one of the most common reservations many of my clients faced before embarking on this transformative journey was the belief that they needed more time to implement changes and improve their circumstances.

The refrain, “I’ll start when I have more time,” echoed in the minds of many. It’s a sentiment I’m intimately familiar with, having wrestled with it myself.

Have you heard of the ‘when/then’ fallacy?

It’s a cognitive trap we often find ourselves ensnared in. It sounds something like this:

“When I have more time, then I’ll start making healthier choices.”

“When I’m financially stable, then I’ll start saving money.”

“When my life gets less chaotic, then I’ll focus on reducing stress.”

“When my relationship is perfect, then I’ll invest in improving it.

“It’s akin to saying, “I’ll pay for the gym membership once I’m already in shape.” The absurdity is clear, isn’t it?

However, it’s precisely this type of thinking that keeps us stationary, mired in procrastination and hesitation. We wait for the perfect moment, the ideal circumstances, the magic hour when everything aligns.

But here’s the truth: that moment rarely arrives. The truth is, waiting for the perfect conditions is like chasing a mirage — it’s an illusion that leads nowhere.

The root of this procrastination is fear and uncertainty, two insidious forces that often lurk beneath the surface of our intentions. Our brains are wired to avoid uncertainty; they crave the comfort of routine, even if that routine is making us miserable.

This is the invisible chain that holds us back, preventing us from embracing change and embarking on transformative journeys.

Allow me to introduce you to John, a client who was caught in this very web of uncertainty. When he first reached out to me, he voiced a common concern: “Can I really achieve this transformation with my busy life? I have a business to run and a family to care for.”

The High Value Executive program is designed with the minimum effective dose principle in mind. This means that even amidst a bustling schedule, you can cultivate life-altering habits.

By cutting out irrelevant activities and focusing on what truly matters, you save time and energy. John recognized the value of this approach and decided to take a leap of faith.

As he began implementing the methods and strategies, he experienced a remarkable shift within just 30 days. His confidence grew, and he found a new sense of calm amidst life’s storms.

Three months later, the transformation was undeniable. His self-esteem soared, his relationships with his family deepened, he handled stress with newfound ease, and the weight of anxiety was lifted from his shoulders.

What’s remarkable is that the process felt natural and authentic to him, a journey that not only uplifted his own life but had positive ripples throughout his family. The transformation led to tangible personal and professional gains, and perhaps most importantly, he felt like the father and husband he’d always wanted to be.

Was it an effortless journey for John? No, he put in the work, faced challenges, and pushed through moments of discomfort.

Yet, the rewards he reaped were invaluable.

And here’s the truth that I want to share with you: if you’re willing to put in the effort, if you’re ready to roll up your sleeves and embrace change, I’m here to guide you every step of the way.

The High Value Executive program isn’t a shortcut; it’s a commitment to growth and transformation. It’s about acknowledging the ‘when/then’ fallacy and embracing the power of the present. It’s about recognizing that waiting for the ‘right time’ is a trap, and the time to act is now.

So, if you’re ready to embark on a journey that leads to enhanced leadership, stronger relationships, improved well-being, and personal fulfilment, then I’m here to support you.

Together, we’ll break free from the chains of uncertainty, and you’ll discover the true potential that lies within you. It won’t always be easy, but with dedication and guidance, you can achieve results that will amaze you. Are you willing to take the leap?

Click here to apply

How you can reach your goals

Most people don’t know how to reach their goals or realise their true potential.

They think if they do this, a bit of that, then some more of this that magically whatever they want will fall in their lap.

That’s not how it works!

You see, there’s only one thing that must change (if you want to achieve a predetermined goal that you’ve set for yourself).

Your habits!

Take fitness as an example:

The vast majority of guys who want to get in shape will go the gym.

They go for a while and assume that one day they’ll wake up looking like Arnold in his prime. Or Brad Pitt in Fight Club (whichever floats their boat).

They put no conscious thought into changing their habits.

They won’t adjust their eating habits. And they’ll remain ignorant about their stress levels.

And a short while of after not seeing their desired results they’ll quit.

What I work on with my clients is getting them to focus on their HABITS, not their goals.

Their habits are will get them them to their goal.

I cannot stress enough the importance of your habits and routine.

Do they match your goals?

If someone looked at what you do each day would they be able to accurately guess what you’re trying to achieve?

Andrew

The Fitness Gentleman

P.S. If you feel as though you are ready to move the mental roadblocks stopping you from strengthening your body and your mindset so you can reach your goals. I invite you to a Free Discovery Call here where we can have a chat about your goals and how you can go about achieving them.

You vs The Monkey

Most guys know what to do but aren’t doing it.

This is why your health and fitness isn’t an information problem, it’s an implementation problem.

This means it’s less about the method and more about the mindset.

What you need to realize is, that making a transformation, one that will have you looking and feeling at your best. Is achieved through discipline.

I’m not talking about being perfect 24/7.

I’m saying that the majority of the decisions you make need to be in line with your goal. And the ones that aren’t don’t undo the work you’ve done.

It comes down to an internal battle between you and your monkey brain.

You see the monkey brain wants you to relax and take the easy option.

The monkey brain has a penchant for fornication, debauchery and immediate pleasure.

Do things that will provide it with stimulus and excitement (although they won’t be challenging or uncomfortable). This is why it’s so easy to plicate.

But after a while, of giving in to these cravings they leave you feeling a little hollow and disappointed.

Because once again you’ve been persuaded by the monkey. Who has led you astray.

Yeah, it was fun and you had a good laugh but that monkey has led you so far off course you’re now a bit lost.

You’re stumbling around trying to get back to the correct path. Cursing yourself for giving in to the petulant primate. Who keeps distracting you from not doing what you said you were going to do.

Frustrated you didn’t have the discipline to ignore that wretched beast and his easy enticements.

The thing is when you start out with addressing this the monkey brain, it isn’t a cute little Capuchin. No no no it’s an adult silverback gorilla.

It’s so powerful. You feel almost helpless when it comes to stopping it from doing what it wants.

But when you have a plan and some accountability that sees you build your discipline.

That is when you’ll start to see that monkey shrink. And so to its power over you. All the way until you have only a cute little Pygmy Marmoset to deal with.

It is at this point that you’ll be at your best. You’ll be doing what you should be doing. Not what the monkey wants you to.

Which is how you get you to that place where you have the energy and confidence that you’re after. And built the discipline that will permeate all areas of your life.

Plus the added satisfaction that comes from knowing that you’ve bettered that pesky monkey!

Want to find out more about improving your vitality, confidence and performance?

Click here

Information overload

When it comes to being at your mental and physical best you don’t need more information.

What you need is implementation!

There is an abundance of information out there but when you have no clue about how you integrate this information into your lifestyle, it then becomes moot.

You might as well have not read the information because…

knowing but not doing is the same as not knowing!

With working from home or hybrid working seemingly becoming the status quo a lot of people’s routines have been disrupted. 

With home and work having no clear delineation managing your time has never been so important!

It’s imperative you organise your day, implementing the actions essential to get you back to your best.

Simple practices you can factor in to ensure you are firing on all cylinders.

For example how about more activity in your day, now that commuting has gone/lessened.

You can do this by introducing something, I call a fauxmute.

You leave your house at the normal that you would have when you were working in the city. You walk for less or up the same time as your commute was. But instead of going to the office, you loop back home.

Only it isn’t home – you are arriving at your place of work.

You arrive prepared physically and mentally. You crack on at your desk in your designated place for work.

Then you do the same fauxmute when you finish your work. Leaving your place of work and returning home.

This will improve your ability to switch off when you arrive ‘home’.

Which leads me to my next implementation tactic.

Compartmentalization.

Ensuring the rooms in your home are designated for designated tasks. 

Bedroom – sleep/sex
Office – work
Kitchen – cooking
etc.

This optimises something is called your orientating perception. (Your brain’s recognition of an environment).

Once you start merging tasks with other rooms you will only add to your stress. You’ll have low concentration and poor output.

When you put in place these simple tactics you’ll be taking steps to liberate yourself from a slump, inject energy into tired days, and even give you the get-up-and-go to power up the career ladder. 

Immediate gratification

I know the process of exercise doesn’t feel good, in fact, it’s quite the opposite at the time. Being hot, sweaty, uncomfortable it’s quite an ordeal.

The same goes for food choices, it’s effort to cook a meal that will be better for you than a takeaway.

And getting to bed at a reasonable time rather than staying up for some more down time is tough.

Putting time aside to journal or meditate is also a challenge. Because at the back of your mind you know you’ve got a lot on your plate and you could be tackling some of that.

Doing these things gives us a short lived sense of achievement. From knowing that we’ve done something good for our health, but it’s negligible.

Everything else in our lives we get immediate gratification from. A take away meal or fast food gives us a big wave of dopamine. A cigarette gives us a nicotine hit, an alcoholic beverage gives us a buzz. Ordering something online arrives next day (sometimes the same day, thanks Mr Bezos)

It’s hard because we live in a world that caters for immediate gratification. Yet, these acute immediate gratifications are short lived. And some even come with remorse!

They’re very easy to fall into the habit of doing. When you’re busy with work and kids you might not be prepared to eat that well. Also, eating the stuff that’s not so great for you feels good when you’re stressed (thanks alot dopamine).

It’s easy not to go to the gym because ‘you haven’t got time’ or ‘you’re not feeling up for it’

It’s easy to watch another episode and stay up late because your day hasn’t included any time for you. It’s been all work, work, work.

With exercise, sleep, your diet, stress management there isn’t an clear or immediate feel-good association. Only the pat on the back you give yourself.

This immediate gratification is what you are fighting against in order to make a change.

Not giving into the things that feel good now but doing the things that will pay off later. Delayed gratification. The gratification that comes from achieving confidence from looking and feeling good. That feeling of being stronger, healthier, energised takes a bit of time.

But, imagine waking up every day feeling good, happy with what you see in the mirror. Thinking ‘you know what I’m going to change my social media profile pic to not just a headshot’.

‘I’m going to get those jeans from that store’.

This gratification will not be short lived! This will be with you for the foreseeable future, long-term happiness.

The blame game

The big mindset switch for me, the thing that has helped me the most, was from when I was studying psychology.


It was something that resonated with me and has been so important in my perspective of life. Thinking about it today it’s almost like a secret that I’m so glad came to hear about.


This secret, this Bastian of power is taking responsibility. No longer believing that other things were to blame. It was down to me. Thinking this was flipped the narrative and meant I took charge of my life.


I believe that no matter what happens to me I created it on some level. I am responsible for it. It it’s not there because of my physical actions it’s there because of my mental action. Thoughts of things which I’ve attracted.


And here is why you might want to adopt this belief system, because the alternative is scary! Let me explain. If you’re not in control of your life, you’re not responsible. If you blame others or circumstances, you’ve got a big problem! Because you have no power to change it. You are impotent.


But with the belief system I’m proposing to you. the belief that you are not a victim of circumstance. If you believe that whatever has happened is down to you generating it on some level. Then if you don’t like it you can change it!


Do you see where I’m going with this? My point being that I’m not trying to make you feel culpable. But I’m empower you, so if you don’t like how things are going you know you can change them.


In victim mode the following things or circumstances are responsible for your health:


Carbs

Thyroid/slow metabolism

Big bones

Lack of time

Body type


When you take control /responsibility what you’ll see is that your poor health and fitness is down to:


Lack of self control

Unaware of energy balance

Overestimating your calorie expenditure

Rewarding yourself with food

Poor food choices

Poor stress coping mechanisms


Now I know it’s easy to play the blame game. I’ve been there. The universe, him, her, this, that and everything else but myself, was to blame for why I wasn’t where I wanted to be.


But once you take responsibility for everything, good or bad. You can take credit for the wins. But you must also take responsibility when it doesn’t go your way. Knowing that you can change it!


You are 100% in control of your health and fitness!

Small commitments, big results

When addressing health and fitness the common misconception is that it you have to make some dramatic overhaul to your life.


That countless hours will have to spent at the gym on exercises you detest.


Your diet will have to be drastically adjusted and a large chunk of time will be spent with meal prepping.


Sleep, stress and recovery plans will impact your week placing even more time constraints on you.


When the reality is you only need to adjust what you are already doing. No more time required just optmising what you are already doing.


The time you spend exercising will not change only the exercises and how you organise that training. To ensure that you are building muscle and boosting testosterone levels.


The time you assign to your diet will not change only the choices you make with your meal selections. To ensure that you are energised and managing your weight.


Sleep and recovery can be improved so that your performance is better. Because improving your performance is not about how hard you can go at it. It’s about how well you can recover.


Knowing this is important because time is precious and what with juggling other demands. Working long hours. Caring for family. Trying to manage a business. And so on. The last thing you want to feel like is that you have to give more time to something.


With The Limitless Lifestyle Blueprint you have a Health Professional take care of everything for you. All the heavy lifting is done. No more guess work. No more time wasted doing redundant diets. Irrelevant exercise routines, or erroneous sleep and stress regimes. You have a plan to follow and support and accountability along the way.


The only extra time you need to set aside are for our weekly check ins. Where we go over what progress you’ve been making with performance and what, needs adjusting as your body changes and if your lifestyle changes.


Not more time, time better spent.