Hello *|FNAME|*,
Have you ever thought to yourself?
‘why when it comes to the 11th hour can I not make the right decision and do what I need to do?’
you know this would benefit your self improvement and wellbeing
but instead you do something else that distracts you and steers you further from your goal.
The reason why comes down to several things:
1. Your reliance on motivation
Permanent motivation is a fantasy. No one is always motivated!
If you’re conjuring up an image of someone in your head. They’re not, it’s a misconception.
You might even perceive me as someone who is motivated. I’m not!
My motivation is fleeting at best. I’ve made my peace with not being motivated for protracted periods, and yes I seize it when it’s there.
But motivation only makes the task a little easier, it’s not the determining factor of whether I do what I need to.
My point is this..
…the majority of the time I don’t feel like doing what I need to. But I crack on regardless.
Because I’ve built my discipline and increased my self control.
Plus, I’ve cultivated a routine and environment that doesn’t test my urges, a ‘Ulysses contract’ if you would. So I’m not getting distracted.
That’s not to say I don’t experience temptation and the lure of distraction. I do.
But I’m able to fend it off by acknowledging the distraction.
Then I hear the voice of Gold Five from Star Wars telling me to ‘Stay on target’ and I swat the temptation away like an annoying mosquito.
So I stay focused on the task, present with what I’m doing. Giving it my full attention.
2. Hardwiring
We human beings have some outdated programming.
Our operating systems are running the command: avoid pain, seek pleasure.
Whilst this programming was beneficial for us in the Palaeolithic era (to keep you alive). In the modern era it’s become detrimental to your wellbeing.
We live in an environment where food, fornication, stimulants, amusements are abundant.
This constant drive for pleasure, this archaic programming, is now self destructive.
Companies have tapped into this pleasure drive and are selling you products to appease it.
(which is insidious because they profit as you perish).
There’s now so much pleasure immediately available we’re over consuming. And it’s making us weaker and unhappier.
But you can help yourself. You can recognise the outdated pleasure command and start re coding your mind.
Enter this:
}
partake in activities (that bring) {
short term pain(and long term gain);
}
}
3. Irrelevant goals
Ask yourself; is it actually your goal or are you going along with the masses?
Are you confusing society’s goals with your own? ‘Keeping up with the Jones’. Upgrading your lifestyle but never stopping to ask yourself:
‘if I didn’t care about what others thought, would I still have this as a goal? Or have I been caught up in the facade that I need x because they have it?
When we’re not doing the things that improve our human experience (the things that enhance our wellbeing) we’ll distract ourselves.
We’ll start looking to others. Making comparisons with people who we shouldn’t be. Forming goals and desires based on what they’ve got.
Reminder: if the grass seems greener it’s usually because you haven’t been watering your side!
but these desires are usually superficial.
And here’s the kicker; with superficial goals come superficial rewards.
Happy on the outside (what’s shown to others), but unfulfilled on the inside.
So dig deep and do what you want to do. If it’s different to the herd’s ideal then you’re on the right track!
4. Absence of a routine
Do you find your days are pretty much you performing random tasks based on how you feel?
Or tasks other people have given you because you have no plans of your own?
This is the definition of operating on a whim.
Without a plan, a routine, you’ll experience inconsistence.
Here’s where a routine would be beneficial.
Before you open your calendar and start inputting tasks to fill your time.
I’ve found the best way to go about this is to reverse engineer your goal.
Start off with your purpose, which is your North Star, your direction to follow. This is important because when you have purpose, what you’re doing will mean more to you.
Then you’ll need to set a goal. It’s one thing to know your purpose, but how will you go about fulfilling it?
Set a goal that’s tangible. Make it big, make it specific and give it a deadline.
Now you know your purpose and you know how to realize it (with your goal). You need to know how to get there.
This is why having a plan is important. It allows you to break your goal down. All the way to daily actions.
After that you build habits. Habits are systems and processes for your life. They ease the smooth running of your day. Most of the time you’ll do them automatically.
Achieving your goal is inevitable when you transfer actions from your plan into habits.
Voila.
Speak soon
Andrew
Category: sleep
To achieve this you need to improve your habits. I’ll explain why.
Years ago I was caught in the ‘lottery win’ mindset.
I convinced myself that overnight success was the result of some windfall. A brush with good fortune.
This was the reason people had aquired their life situation.
What didn’t help was that the media, movies and tabloids would all cement this notion.
But as time passed and I started researching, reading, experimenting. And speaking to the most revered in my industry (people who had achieved great levels of success). I began to form a different hypothesis.
One that was at the other end of the spectrum to ‘overnight success’.
That it takes a lot of time for overnight success to occur. It is actually the culmination of months or years of work.
It’s the small efforts repeated daily that led to a better quality of life.
I’m talking about the small actions that we don’t even think about, because they are habitual. The decisions we make in autopilot mode.
But these are the decisions that shape our future.
So how do we address them? And improve the quality of our lives?
Well, there are some steps, 4 actually. Steps that you can climb up to make change inevitable.
1. The first step is the unconscious incompetence stage.
This is when we’re making bad decisions and we aren’t even aware we’re doing it.
We just know that things aren’t working out.
Here’s were something as being cognisant can help. Bringing tracking into the equation. For our sleep, our diet, our exercise and our stress.
‘that sounds like a lot of time‘. I hear you say.
‘Oh contrare mon frère’.
It’s no extra time! – you’re already doing this stuff so you just record at the time.
After this you’ll then enter into the next stage which is
3. The conscious incompetence.
You start to look at the actual decision and data. It makes it clear.
This is where you are aware that you’re not making optimal decions
You can see that you’re not adhering to the plan you have, if you even have a plan.
You can see where poor choices are actually hindering you.
This is the ‘wow I didn’t realise I was having that many calories’
or ‘I thought I was getting more sleep than that’.
‘Maybe I could cancel my gym membership because I’ve only been once this month’
and the classic – ‘this app can’t be working right’.
It is, and they are! Your ego is just having a hard time coming to terms with your choices.
Remember our thoughts are not the truth but rather stories that we get caught up in!
This is the cold hard truth slapping you across the face, the reality punch to the gut!
An uncomfortable period where you realise things are not as they seem. Or rather as you ‘believed’
Quickly moving on to the next stage 🙂
3. The conscious competence stage
This is where your decisions are improving. Due to some changes you’ve implemented (through self or professional guidance).
You’re making better decisions. But they’re not automatic yet. It still requires effort and discipline to make these decisions.
This is a nice stage as you can actually see change occurring with your actions. You feel good from making better decisions.
4. Then you arrive at the unconscious competence stage.
After enough time in the previous stage. These new benficial life changing decisions become automatic.
You’ve likely amended or introduced a routine which makes actions habitual. And in this ascension you’ve form a new identity.
You see yourself as the person who eats healthy, goes to the gym, gets 8 hours sleep. And is relaxed from practicing mindfulness exercises.
You’re energetic and ethused. You have more clarity and you’re making better decisions as this 2.0 version of you.
Which stage are you in?
I’d like to take this opportunity to tell you why I do what I do.
The genesis of becoming a health consultant.
It wasn’t a result of happenstance. It stemmed from an event that occurred in my formative years.
At the time my dad had a senior job in the city which saw him start very early and finish very late.
I didn’t see all that much of him. Some times at the weekend but those periods were fleeting.
This seemed to be the norm for the schooling part of my life.
And over time this high pressure senior role took its toll on him.
His energy levels declined, his stress increased and he was having more doctors appointments.
They were concerned with his health.
Turns out that chronic high stress, zero activity. A diet that resembled a 5 year olds birthday party. And a bullfrogs sleep routine wasn’t all that conducive to a healthy living.
Who knew?!
Reality hit home when the cardiologist said that with without open heart surgery a cardiac event was imminent!
It wasn’t a choice. It was an ultimatum. Surgery or you’ll be shuffling off this mortal coil!
It seemed like only days later he was checked in to hospital.
They opened him up and veins were taken from various other parts of his body and replaced those blocked ones around his heart.
That’s what I was told anyway, this period in my life was a bit blurry.
Although I do remember, very vividly, coming home after school – and finding myself alone a fair bit.
As my mum would be at his bedside at the hospital.
I’d make meals for myself and my mum for when she would return late at night.
It was all a bit surreal. And I didn’t understand the severity of the situation. Not until I went to visit my dad.
I remember it was one of the first times I’d been into the City.
Everything was overwhelming, the amount of people, the buildings the noise and the pace of it all.
Several hours had past in what felt like only a few minutes. And we had reached the station adjacent the hospital.
I remember walking in to the ward and seeing my dad.
I barely recognised him
When I sat down beside him I remember being asked questions by the doctor and nurses.
Light hearted chit chat they’d developed from years of developing a bedside manner.
But I didn’t respond. I could muster any words. My mum had to respond for me. As I was transfixed on my dad.
You know when you feel yourself come out of yourself, in a malaise?! That sort of thing.
I was starring at the person that was lying there in the hospital bed hooked up to the machines, and wiring.
It was almost like he wasn’t a human but part of a machine.
The Doctors and my mum trying to lighten the mood. Regaling me with stories of his projectile vomiting post surgery.
But this didn’t permeate the trance I was in.
I remember feeling numb.
And then I felt anger. Angry that this had happened
That he’d let this happen, that he’d chose this.
It wasn’t an unfortunate set of circumstances or genetics
It was the choices he’d made compounded over time that had culminated in this.
This fucked up situation where I didn’t know if he was coming home or not.
I remember the cessation of our visit and being prompted to say goodbye by my mum. Walking through the hospital wing towards the elevator.
I remember this very clearly. Because that was the defining moment.
It was when I told myself ‘that was not going to happen to me’.
That it was on me to look after myself. I must learn from other peoples mistakes as well as my own.
And my dad was exhibit A.
It felt like this experience had knocked me out of the status quo lifestyle that everyone was living. And into a parallel dimension running alongside it.
An Anthropological dimension. From which I would extrapolate societal norms and collate information.
Whilst doing this I started to realise that it wasn’t just my dad that was in poor health.
It was my friend’s dads too.
And men I was hearing about in the news (back when I used to read/watch it). So many men were struggling.
But no one was talking about the elephant in the room.
Everyone was accepting it as the norm. I suppose when everyone is sick it’s no longer considered a disease.
Fast forward man years from then to today.
I look back at this experience and whilst it was difficult and frustrating at the time.
I was also grateful that I had gone through it.
Because I had found my purpose; to save men from themselves.
To help them develop the discipline they need. To elude the temptations of modern living (which have become the imperceptible demise of men).
It’s this purpose that gets me up in the morning and keeps me going late in the evening.
I’ve become more enthused about efficiency, productivity and lifestyle habits. Because I need the energy to to propel me through the day and work on my mission.
And the beauty of it; the things I do to work on my purpose are self perpetuating. They give me more energy.
Not only that but the job satisfaction I get from.
Helping others to have more energy, and manage their health so they can give 100% to their passion, is incredible.
Knowing they’ve made an important transition in their life and set an important example for the children they’re raising.
Here’s a testimonial from one of my clients, Alex:
Not only has Andy helped my physical health (I’ve managed to lose 10 kg in 3 months), he’s helped my mental health too.
His constant praise, encouragement and holding me accountable for my actions has meant I’m now more motivated and active.
I’ve started writing a book I’ve been wanting to write for ages, and now feel like I have more time and energy to pursue other interests.
I’m even starting to feel better about myself whenever I see a mirror. I’ve even seen some photos of me recently that I haven’t instantly hated 🙂
Given my time again, I would hire Andy in a heartbeat.
Our hormones have a big impact on our emotional state, causing both good and bad mood patterns.
Regulating your hormones significantly improves and balances your emotional health.
There are a lot of things that you are doing throughout the day that have an affect on your hormones. Without you even realising.
Dopamine is a hormone that has a massive effect on us. It’s the chemical messenger in your brain that creates feelings of pleasure and reward. Which motivates you to repeat a specific behaviour.
And modern day temptations are very effective at giving us cheap dopamine hits. They are designed to elicit this ‘feel good’ sensation. It’s at the crux of their design and marketing.
Junk food, Porn, Social media, Booze, Nicotine. All elicit these cheap dopamine hits. And these temporary feel goods are very effective.
They target your weakness and keep you coming back for more.
Alcohol for confidence.
Nicotine anxiety.
Social media for boredom.
Junk food for lethargy.
Porn for arousal.
These acute ‘feel goods’ are so common yet so dangerous. Because use of these cheap dopamine hits results in;
Excessive binge eating,
Poor relationships,
Chronic stress,
High blood pressure,
and poor health.
These cheap dopamine hits are killing you!
And without without discipline, it can be very hard to turn down these temptations because they are so effective and immediate. They offer instant gratification to a problem.
And when you start to depend on them, it’s harder to rid yourself of them.
So rather than going cold turkey – which is incredibly hard. Replace them with natural things that you natural dopamine hits.
Swapping them, so your brain doesn’t really notice.
Imagine yourself as Indiana Jones, in Raiders of the Lost Ark, in the tomb swapping that Golden Idol for a bag of sand.
(but much easier and without the tomb kicking off and trying to kill you).
Here are some easy ways to do that!
Eat a high protein diet.
Proteins are made up of smaller building blocks called amino acids. One amino acid, called tyrosine, plays a critical role in the production of dopamine!
Probiotics
The gut and brain are closely linked. Certain species of bacteria that live in your gut are also capable of producing dopamine.
Exercise
Exercise can boost dopamine levels in the brain. Improvements in mood can be seen after as little as 10 minutes of activity but tend to be highest after at least 20 minutes.
Quality sleep
After poor sleep the availability of dopamine receptors in their brains is dramatically reduced by the next morning.
Getting regular, high quality sleep helps keep your dopamine levels balanced. And help you feel more alert and high functioning during the day
Music
Listening to music is an enjoyable way to stimulate dopamine release in your brain.
Listening to music increases activity in the reward and pleasure areas of the brain, rich with dopamine receptors.
Sunlight
Periods of low sunshine exposure can lead to reduced levels of mood-boosting neurotransmitters. Including dopamine. Sunlight exposure can increase them.
Start swapping the unnatural for the natural and I promise you’ll start to feel better.
Most people don’t know how to reach their goals or realise their true potential.
They think if they do this, a bit of that, then some more of this that magically whatever they want will fall in their lap.
That’s not how it works!
You see, there’s only one thing that must change (if you want to achieve a predetermined goal that you’ve set for yourself).
Your habits!
Take fitness as an example:
The vast majority of guys who want to get in shape will go the gym.
They go for a while and assume that one day they’ll wake up looking like Arnold in his prime. Or Brad Pitt in Fight Club (whichever floats their boat).
They put no conscious thought into changing their habits.
They won’t adjust their eating habits. And they’ll remain ignorant about their stress levels.
And a short while of after not seeing their desired results they’ll quit.
What I work on with my clients is getting them to focus on their HABITS, not their goals.
Their habits are will get them them to their goal.
I cannot stress enough the importance of your habits and routine.
Do they match your goals?
If someone looked at what you do each day would they be able to accurately guess what you’re trying to achieve?
Andrew
The Fitness Gentleman
P.S. If you feel as though you are ready to move the mental roadblocks stopping you from strengthening your body and your mindset so you can reach your goals. I invite you to a Free Discovery Call here where we can have a chat about your goals and how you can go about achieving them.
When it comes to a healthy way of living the Mediterranean’s always seem to get a mention.
They are renowned for their longevity and wellbeing. Many attribute their diet to the reason behind this.
Although over the years I’ve come up with a hypothesis. The premise is that it’s more to do with their geography and culture.
Yes the Mediterranean diet is pretty good, (if you delve into it they get a balance of fats in their diet; monounsaturated, saturated & polyunsaturated and it is high in nutritional value.
But if you look deeper into their lifestyle they also have geography and culture working for them.
The abundance of sunlight they receive provides them with sufficient vitamin D. Something that us Northerners (hemisphere that is) lack.
And, the most salient point, the emphasis they put on sleep.
Biphasic sleep is sown into their culture. Think about it. They down tools every afternoon for a nap.
Siesta.
Not to mention they have such stringent laws on light pollution.
They protect their sleep and it pays off in spades. Especially when it comes to their national health bill.
The same can’t be said for us in the UK. Incurring a £197.4 billion health bill in 2019. And that cost has increased every year since.
Our geography is not as favourable, and our culture not as health conscious or cognisant. And that my friend is a problem because;
when everyone is sick, we no longer consider it a disease!
– Ravikant.
We wear sleep deprivation as a badge of honour when it’s work related.
Which is ironic seeing as though sleep loss over an extended period of time can cause decreased cognitive performance.
Essentially with poor sleep you’re not in control of your emotions and your emotions can control your behaviour.
This leads to the inability to make sound judgments. Poorer choices and below par performance. Along with it health concerns.
Which is why to be at your best you have to optimise your lifestyle. Nutrition, Stress management, Exercise and Sleep.
All these things done well will see you operate at your best.
You’ll have emotional regulation which aids self control, which is a superpower. I would say better than invisibility or flying.
Ultimately you will be making better decisions.
And you are the sum total of all your decisions!
How’s it all going with your health and fitness drive?
Whatever your reason behind it. Maybe it’s your self-confidence; you’re not over enamoured with what you see when you look in the mirror.
Maybe it’s stemmed from you getting dressed in the morning and thinking to yourself ‘hmm this top wasn’t this tight before Christmas.’
It could be that your partner is highlighting stuff by making subtle hints. Maybe that Peloton bike they brought you for Christmas had an ulterior motive behind it?
Whichever it may be, these all feel pretty shit.
And maybe your new year’s resolution efforts have waned?
If they have don’t beat yourself up. It’s not you, it’s the method/strategy you chosen.
What you’ve tried hasn’t been sustainable.
Mainstream weight loss or fitness programs are nothing more than a roll of the dice!
They’re not a sensible bet!
The odds of you achieving success with these methods are minuscule.
Without accountability, a proven strategy, and support, you’ve got little to no chance.
How about rather than taking a punt, a flutter, a spin you make an investment?!
An investment in a strategy that will be the last you will ever need for your health and fitness.
No more confusion about what to do for getting fitter healthier, performing better looking good, and feeling great.
I know that taking that first step is the hardest. So I’ll make it easy for you. Click here
Did you know that getting adequate and good quality sleep has a significant impact on hormone balance and muscle protein synthesis.
Outside of muscle growth, sleep deprivation has also been directly linked to an increase in appetite and as a result an increase in body fat. Because when you are not getting enough quality sleep hormones called Ghrelin and Leptin are affected and can effect our hunger levels.
Poor sleep will also lead to detrimental effects on your immune system
Because sleep helps T cells, a key part of our immune system, get to other places. Having enough T cells around to keep an eye on things means that we’re better able to start an immune response as needed.
But that’s not all. Remember that sleep helps us learn and remember? Well, it works for immune cells too.
Sleep boosts the immune system’s ability to ‘remember’ particular antigens, such as viruses. And more effectively produce antibodies or specific defenses against a particular antigen.
The most beneficial phases of sleep are the 2-3 hours of deep sleep we should experience each night. Deep sleep is very restorative and is where our stress hormone cortisol is at its lowest. And other hormones that support muscle growth are at their most potent.
Phases of sleep and the circadian system affect our immune and inflammatory responses. During this period there are changes to levels of various hormones.
These hormonal changes help boost the adaptive immune response. By helping it learn and “remember” antigens. When we sleep, our immune system is transferring what it’s learned about specific antigens (such as viruses) into its ‘long-term memory’. Which helps it recognize and respond effectively to the same antigens in future.
Cortisol is a stress-response and steroid hormone that regulates a wide range of vital body processes. And, it plays a crucial role in our sleep.
Under normal circumstances, cortisol follows a strong circadian rhythm. It’s highest when we first wake up, and decreases throughout the day.
When we don’t get enough sleep, we see less variation in the circadian rhythm of cortisol. We don’t get the highest highs in the morning, nor does cortisol drop as much in the evening.
This means that we often end up with higher measurements of cortisol after poor sleep because it doesn’t decrease like it should. On top of that, not getting enough sleep is stressful, too!
So, does it matter if we get a bad night’s sleep, or if our cortisol is too high, or both?
Yes.
Some research has suggested that cortisol could be the factor that links poor sleep to the development of depression. These things often go together.
For instance, a hallmark symptom of depression is changes in sleep. Including more awakenings in the night, difficulty falling asleep, and less deep sleep. Unsurprisingly, people who have depression often also have higher concentrations of cortisol.
If we’re able to improve our sleep and reduce our cortisol levels (i.e., deal with our sleep and stress), it will likely also help us better take care of our emotional, psychological and social well-being.
You can get started on improving your sleep quality by:
- increasing darkness in the bedroom
- have a regular time for going to bed
- remove electrical equipment from the bedroom
- maintain a cool temperature in the bedroom
- use an alarm that will wake you up in a light sleep phase
Dealing in absolutes isn’t a good idea. When we use terminology such as good or bad or ‘always’ and ‘never’ it creates a false dichotomy.
Which is an informal fallacy based on a premise. That erroneously limits what options are available. The source of the fallacy lies not in an invalid form of inference but in a false premise.
And limiting options is not a good thing. Especially when it comes to methods of improving your health.
You may have asked ‘is this good for me?’
And the answer will likely be – it comes down to the amount!
One doughnut will not make you unhealthy just the same as one salad will not make you healthy.
We as human beings always look to simplify things. But when it comes to sleep, stress, food and exercise it’s not applicable.
To simplify and state that all stress is bad would be ignorant. As a certain amount of stress is beneficial to us (the amount depends on the individual).
To say that sugar is bad and you should never have it would be extreme and irrelevant. As it offers benefits both physiologically and psychologically.
Claiming that only sleep under certain conditions is good, also erroneous.
When we strive for these extremes and perfections only to fall short it can quite often be damaging. That’s why I propose you don’t!
Instead of being inconsistently perfect with your diet, exercise, stress, and sleep. Aim for being consistently alright. That is when you’ll start to notice improvement.
To do this, rather than thinking in switches (‘on’ or ‘off’) think in dials (1-10). It adds flexibility and sustainability when gauging the health practices in your life.
I know the process of exercise doesn’t feel good, in fact, it’s quite the opposite at the time. Being hot, sweaty, uncomfortable it’s quite an ordeal.
The same goes for food choices, it’s effort to cook a meal that will be better for you than a takeaway.
And getting to bed at a reasonable time rather than staying up for some more down time is tough.
Putting time aside to journal or meditate is also a challenge. Because at the back of your mind you know you’ve got a lot on your plate and you could be tackling some of that.
Doing these things gives us a short lived sense of achievement. From knowing that we’ve done something good for our health, but it’s negligible.
Everything else in our lives we get immediate gratification from. A take away meal or fast food gives us a big wave of dopamine. A cigarette gives us a nicotine hit, an alcoholic beverage gives us a buzz. Ordering something online arrives next day (sometimes the same day, thanks Mr Bezos)
It’s hard because we live in a world that caters for immediate gratification. Yet, these acute immediate gratifications are short lived. And some even come with remorse!
They’re very easy to fall into the habit of doing. When you’re busy with work and kids you might not be prepared to eat that well. Also, eating the stuff that’s not so great for you feels good when you’re stressed (thanks alot dopamine).
It’s easy not to go to the gym because ‘you haven’t got time’ or ‘you’re not feeling up for it’
It’s easy to watch another episode and stay up late because your day hasn’t included any time for you. It’s been all work, work, work.
With exercise, sleep, your diet, stress management there isn’t an clear or immediate feel-good association. Only the pat on the back you give yourself.
This immediate gratification is what you are fighting against in order to make a change.
Not giving into the things that feel good now but doing the things that will pay off later. Delayed gratification. The gratification that comes from achieving confidence from looking and feeling good. That feeling of being stronger, healthier, energised takes a bit of time.
But, imagine waking up every day feeling good, happy with what you see in the mirror. Thinking ‘you know what I’m going to change my social media profile pic to not just a headshot’.
‘I’m going to get those jeans from that store’.
This gratification will not be short lived! This will be with you for the foreseeable future, long-term happiness.