You can’t stay the same, and expect things to change. If you work 60+ hours a week the likelihood is you’ll struggle to focus on your family.
Believe me I’ve been there.
For a long time I was operating on the premise that hard work, long hours and self-sacrifice proved my commitment to my family. And that should suffice.
It’s not easy for someone whose primary identity is that of ‘family breadwinner’ to reassess that identity.
You’re now factoring in the role of Dad and husband.
And when it comes to your relationship, which is definitely not the fairy-tale Disney sold you. Walt forgot to mention that there’d be:
arguments
frustration
disagreements
periods of disconnection
Then there’s parenting, which will test you to levels you never knew existed.
the constant requests (average 3 per minute for toddlers)
the tantrums (these were an adventure)
your attention
physical interaction (rough housing)
emotional support (I was lost when starting out)
And on top you also have your needs, to give your best to your profession.
What you need to understand is being a Dad, a husband, a business owner is easy.
But the being good at them, well that takes skill. A skill I call personal development.
Something my coach, helped me to understand is; to change your situation, you have to change yourself. Which is why I hired a coach.
To ensure I wasn’t guilty of mental masturbation; knowing what I should do but not actioning it. That’s called cognitive dissonance, and it’s a very uncomfortable place to live.
So I developed a system to ensure I could execute the essentials everyday.
Yes, at times it was hard (sometimes it seemed impossible). And I wasn’t perfect. But it worked.
Being consistent with the system saw me become a better father, a better husband, and a better person.
Now, if you’re saying to yourself, ‘I want to, but I don’t have the time’. That’s exactly what I used to think. That’s a limiting belief.
And these beliefs create a narrative, an Eco chamber that keeps you stuck.
Chances are you’re already doing these things. They just need a bit of tweaking to improve the quality and achieve the desired outcome.
That’s why I devised the system with the minimum effective dose in mind. The least amount of work (daily habits) that will yield results.
Click on the link here to learn more about my High Value Executive program.
